The quality of my life depends on my expectations. What does that mean?
Being happy doesn’t necessarily mean that I just feel good all the time. Happiness depends on if my reality is better or worse than my expectations.
Ever wonder why you have more drama with the people you love the most versus everyone else? We get frustrated with for example family, because we have expectations of them. We expect them to think, act, and treat us and others a certain way. And when they don’t do things that meet our expectations, we get frustrated, disappointed, even angry. We don’t get as easily frustrated with strangers because we don’t really have a strong expectation of them. This is huge. We get frustrated with certain people because we have certain expectations of them that aren’t met. So if I get frustrated with someone, I’ll ask myself “what do I expect from this person, and how did they fail to meet it?” followed by, “Is it important to have these expectations? and can I let this expectation go?” When someone is frustrated with me, I’ll ask, “What did they expect of me and how did I fail to meet it?” followed by, “Is it important that I meet these expectations?” Is there something I need to change, or can I let it go? Looking at drama, arguments, frustration and anger in an objective perspective helps me be less emotional and more logical. Being more logical is helpful because most people are emotional, and it always takes 2 people to argue.
Have you ever had a great experience at a restaurant that blew you away? It probably because the restaurant did something that exceeded your expectations. How do we keep having great experiences? We can lower our expectations which is difficult because it’s easier said than done. We can’t control what we expect. But we can focus on the good stuff to make the experience more valuable. We seek what what find. Even in a bad situation, we can focus on the good stuff and change the entire situation in our mind.